Polyamory has changed me so Bi Girls Club changed too.

A few years ago, when I was still new to polyamory, I created Bi Girls Club. It was a merch shop for bisexual folks and it was my baby! It gave me a space to celebrate different expressions of bisexuality. When COVID hit in 2020, the fulfillment and delivery delays made it impossible to continue, but I always said it was something I would come back to.

It’s 2023 now, and none of us are the same––thanks to COVID, capitalism, rising fascism, etc.

I wrote a book and never fully stopped to celebrate it because I was so deep in survival mode. I was like, what’s next? Quickly, before the next plague. 

I went to coding school. I found so many new ways to create content about sex education. Meanwhile, exploring non-monogamy and kink was taking me to places I never truly expected. I was on an episode of Red Table Talk, I let thousands of people watch me on a dating show, and then again, and again. 

I dated people without onlookers, too, of course. And I fell deeply in love with my current partners Bear and Liv.

My relationships. My metamours have changed me. 

I wanted to reboot Bi Girls Club––but I’m too different now. My bisexual community has become so non-monogamous, so willing to reimagine loving and f*cking, and I wanted Bi Girls Club to become that too.

Collaboration over competition.

I created Metamour Culture with my boyfriend, Bear, and my metamour (his girlfriend), Fifi (@bear.n.fifi). 

It refers to the collaborative nature of queer loving and it’s a reminder that we can step beyond prescribed societal roles & be exactly who we want to be.

For a lot of people, the concept of a metamour is scary or adversarial. Your partner’s other partner?  We’re programmed to believe that relationship is inherently going to be a competitive one. But for me, and for a lot of polyamorous people, metamours are family.

They’re people we can strategize with on how to love and support our partners. They show us alternate sides of our partners, and sometimes even ourselves. Whether we personally like all of our metamours or not, there is a deep respect that can (and should!) exist in these relationships. That, to me, is part of what makes polyamory so beautiful.

That respect, which is worth celebrating, expands to form what I’m calling ‘a metamour culture’.

Our first streetwear-inspired collection celebrates being weird, different, and still loved. It’s for metamours, which is absolutely a polyamory term. But it’s also a queer term. It’s a term that speaks to the nature of chosen family. It, much like queerness, expands beyond its container.

I hope you love the designs we create and that the concept of a metamour culture resonates. And you’ll see other collections celebrating bisexuality, non-monogamy, and chosen family soon. ✨